Truth About Me and College

So this is the post where I'm going to be honest about school and express my feeling on going back to college and gush about it.

This was the last summer I would have, you know. Since I'll not be experiencing the summer fun for the next 2 years or so. Why? Because there won't be summer breaks anymore during 3^rd year and 4^th year of Accountancy. We are going to basically like study Monday to Saturday, morning to evening, June to May, all throughout the next two years. So help me God. Anyway, school starts by Monday June 9. I DON'T WANT TO GO YET. I CANT GO YET. I AM NOT READY. I need vacation for 6 months, twice a year. I just don't want to deal with lessons and projects and assignments and just everything about school and college just yet. Sometimes I feel like I'm so done with school. Like “that'st it so freaking done of you school I just couldn't anymore”. I just want to get a job now and work and have money to buy books. I want the world to end so there will be no more school, you know just book scavenging and surviving.

I just can't put my brain and body to be prepared for school because I never will. I've been studying 16 years now, isn't that enough????! I'm just so tired. It feels like my brain cells are already deep-fried. Just 2 more years of schooling and studying but I feel like I don't want anymore. It just gives nothing but STRESS AND HEADACHE AND PAIN. If other says they're excited in going back to the university, oh wow what a hard-core liar. What's school got but crappy teachers and noisy and gossiping and pathetic students? I'd rather hibernate in my room with a billion of books and endless supply of food. Basically me at school: OH HEY MUGGLES. HELLO MUNDANES. HI MORTALS. WHATEVER PANSY CAKES. UGH SHUCKS AND SLINTHEADS. Imagine being swarmed with non book-reader monsters. Unbearable right? And I just don't care about people and school stuff. Me and those doesn't mix well. Like mixing a sweet food to a salty one. Who cares if other people are so proud about their popularity and intelligence at school? We'll all just gonna die anyway, what's the use? And I just don't care and I'm like, “Should I know you? Should I care about your life?” IF I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE I DON'T CARE! College is not fun. College is MORE STRESSFUL THAN HIGH SCHOOL. COLLEGE IS MORE STRESSFUL THAN ANYTHING YOU CAN EVER IMAGINE. So don't go to college! Kidding!

Especially Accounting! 4 ACCOUNTING SUBJECTS! Tobias accounting subjects! I don't know how I'm going to deal with that. I still don't know how to love Accounting. This isn't my field to be honest. I WANTED to take up Architecture/Creative Writing but because of old house oldies, I was pushed to study Accountancy. I was, because my Dad is a frustrated CPA. He didn't take his board exam which was major stupidity of him! And now he's letting us suffer of his frustration. I wish I didn't do what he wanted me to do 2 years ago. I wish I just disobeyed him and enrolled to whatever course I wanted to. Accounting is hard. That is a universal fact. Accounting is mind-blowing, mind-numbing, and heartbreaking. This is the most crucial year in Accountancy at our University. Third year. If you're not at your best well sorry. This time I say to Accounting that I AM NOT GOING TO BACK DOWN. You challenge me? SO BE IT! One thing I know is that I'd emerge as a victor.

I am only going to school just because the law requires me to. And Allowance. And so that I'll get a good job someday so I can sustain myself and buy all the books I ever wanted. So are you going back to school on Monday or not? Yes, but I say I'm not yet ready and I still don't want to go back. Not just yet.

Book Swags I got this year and the past

   Being a reader is one of the biggest blessing ever. I'm glad I was born a reader and fangirl, If I wasn't I would not have these books and bookmarks and fandom items and the like. So what more can a reader-fangirl ask for if she has lots of books already? Well of course, we need bookmarks and book swags. What are book swags? They are book related stuff which is given to the readers by the authors themselves and other bloggers as giveaways.

Some are bookmarks, booklets, posters, cards, charms, jewelries and others. Some are signed by the author, some are not. You see I have now a lot of bookmarks but I'm not using them all. Or I'm not using any of them or giving them away either. I keep them as a collection and consider them as a treasure (I even hide them lol) but anyway here are the list of bookmarks I have now, thanks to these wonderful and generous authors and bloggers who had given me these beautiful pretties.

Signed Of Poseidon, Of Triton, Degrees of Wrong bookmarks from Anna Banks

Degrees of Wrong booklets from Anna Banks and Lis Les Livres 

Signed Sweet Evil and Sweet Peril Bookmarks from Wendy Higgins

Author autograph tabs from Wendy Higgins

Signed Sweet Evil Poster from Jennifer Muswani

Divergent Bookmark from Krystal Angela

Hunger Games Bookmark from Krystal Angela

TMI and TID bookmarks from Krystal Angela

Dimitri Kozlovsky bookmark from Krystal Angela

and reader-fangirl-booknerd bookmarks from Krystal Angela

   You won't be blessed if you don't share what you receive right? So of all these (precious) bookmarks I think I've given at most 10 to 15 of all of the book swags I received to friends, family and others. But I thank God, he's been replacing those of another pretties to come, like right now I'm waiting for my Of Neptune bookmarks from Fierce Reads. (I can't wait okay, my Syrena legacy bookmarks will be completed.)

   Some people are so kind and generous in giving away items to us readers without asking for anything in return. Like Ms. Krystal Angela from Australia, I mean can you imagine she sent me my bookmarks here in the Philippines, without asking for anything in return? How much did it cost her to print these bookmarks not to mention the postage the cost her a few dollars. She's just so kind. I'd like to thank her very much. So, to you readers out there who are in need of bookmarks kindly, check her blog (krystalangela.blogspot.com/‎) and check her freebies and email her about what you'd want. Good luck and hopefully she can still send you some.

   

   I also thank Wendy and Anna. They are I think the most generous author that ever lived. So everybody please read their beautiful books and get the chance to be able to interact and talk to them even just in social sites. (I really want to meet them personally) and it's really an honor to be an admin of their PH street teams.

  Oh and by the way, I really dunno how to send these SASE's (Self addressed stamped envelopes) internationally where you get to pay all the cost and the author would put in some swags and send it back. (I don't know how to do it internationally) so I'd be very happy if you can help me. I'd be having more book swags if I really know how to send those.

Dealing with heartbreak: How to

   I never thought I could ever be heartbroken. (Really heartbroken. Not mentally, not fictionally heartbroken.) Funny metaphor right? That last word. “Heart-broken” like it implies that the heart is some kind of precious,expensive and fragile porcelain placed in the middle of our hollow chests, when in reality it's actually flesh pumping muscle that involuntary beats and does what it wants because we can't control it.

   Why do we have feelings? Sometimes they are just too illogical to even understand and feel. They can't explain any right thing at all. They have no right to control us like this and make us feel this way. Make us feel pathetic and desperate. “Her favorite feeling was the absence of feeling” should be it.

   Is it really God's plan to break couples who we thought are “a match-made-in-heaven”, “soul-mates”, “til-end-of-the-world-lovers”? I don't think so. He did not let two individuals meet and experience everything, and feel everything together just to hurt them in the end, just to break them in the end, just to keep them away from each other and forget and set aside everything that they felt and did and everything-. It's so cosmically wrong.

   Love conquers all right? But why does one lover have to give up? Why can't they just fight for the one they love until the end? Love is the only one worth fighting for in this pathetic, sad and tragic planet of ours, is it not? It doesn't make any sense. I don't understand. I can't understand why one has to give up something worth more than diamonds for just those simple irrelevant things? How could two just give up like that? Isn't love not enough?

   They say we mend each other. But how can they mend each other when they we're the one who broke each other? How can they mend each other if they're both broken? They can't.

   There's this post by an anon facebook friend (by Ian Kenneth Manding)

"One day, you'll realize that breaking up just because you don't "have time for each other" is the stupidest thing. More stupid than the Crocs you're wearing. More stupid than Rebecca Black's Friday.

You'll realize that your relationship could have been bigger than telling sweet nothings, holding hands and cuddling but you reduced it to those forms. 

You'll think of the nice things you would have done together given that one day you'll both settle down into one single roof. You could have been going on roadtrips together, kissing everytime you get the chance.

You'll think of the unborn babies whose laughter would have been music to you; whose kisses would have meant the world to you; whose smiles would have been the reason for your smiles, too.

And you'll regret it. You'll regret that you did not fight for your partner. You'll regret that you weren't strong enough - both of you weren't strong enough. You'll find yourself in the corner answering your own bitter 'what ifs.'"

   Regret's will surely come rushing to you as the surf rushes to the shore if you didn't do everything to fix what's broken. Even if it's beyond fixable, a little love and faith in God can do the trick to restore back together what's beautifully broken and make a better art out of it. Deal with those heartaches, and erase them with the love you have for each other. Please don't make yourself regret this, just think of those unborn babies.

   PS: Romeo and Juliet, please, please and please get back together.

What to expect on Bookish Bookkeeper for the rest of the summer.

I just learned about these book memes and I think you'll be expecting some in this blog for the rest of the summer or if I could continue at least for the rest of the year and beyond why-ever-not?

TOP TEN TUESDAYS.

I have always associated the phrase “top ten” on academics. Well, you know, being in the honor role and being cream on the crop, etcetera. So right now, I see this would be fun to do, at least for me. Live a little, Mighta! (Yeah, I'm doing it right now, I hope) I plan to do this at least once a month. Twice a month tops. I'll do “Top Ten Fictional Crushes as of April 2014” and “Top Ten Summer TBR list” for this month. So look out for it!

FANCAST FRIDAY.

I made this up. Originally from Bookish Bookkeeper.

Friday is a day for fancasting. In here I will present an actor or model or anyone who I think fits a certain character that can play if there ever will be a movie or who I think looks like the character in real life and that I should have enough evidences to back it up.

First of all, I wish you should note: “Don't fancast unless your fancast is perfect for the fictional character.“ Please don't ever, ever fancast just because you think so, you don't just think so. You should have enough proof that your fancast has everything we're looking for in the fictional character. If you will fancast a brown-haired, blue-eyed guy in a certain book and is 17 y/o you don't fancast a 31 year-old black-haired guy with brown eyes for the character. So definitely not.

Will do post an article of this for once (perhaps twice if time and laziness permits) a month and I'll be doing Aaron Warner and Juliette Ferrars from Shatter Me Series and Patch Cipriano from Hush Hush Series to James Carstairs from The Infernal Devices and a lot of others too.

STACKING THE SHELVES.

I'll do this every 15^th and 30^th of the month. I'll post all the books I got and bought within that fifteen days. (It'll probably be empty anyway, I kid.) Hopefully I'll have more than 5 books every time I post or I think I might have at least 20 or so. *winks*

SERIES REVIEW SATURDAY or STAND-ALONE REVIEW SATURDAY.

Also I made this up. Originally from Bookish Bookkeeper.

Every other Saturday I will try to review a whole series of books by certain authors and recommend these to other readers. I find a series easier to review than to individually review each of the books. Also, if it isn't a series, I'll do a stand-alone book review saturday. I'll rant about the book or series and give it an honest hearty rating.

PERSONAL BOOKKEEPER'S POST.

Anytime I want to I'll try to write something out of the blue about anything and everything I want to. Or I can write anything about myself or my course or my boyfriend (joke, as if I can ever have one in a lifetime) or just about anything I can think of and I find interesting. You: Wait, why do you have that??? Is this a book blor or??? Me: It's a Personal-Slash-A-Bit-Book-Blog kind of blog, Okay? And who are you to judge? Is this yours? Isn't this my blog? Hey, I hope we're still friends! Anyways,

I'll do my best to keep up on these so help me God! 

the perks of being a student-bookworm-wanting-to-be-a-bookblogger

I might not be a book blogger today, but maybe someday.

Remember those crazy times when we we're just kids, running around with toys and not caring if we don't get 5 stars for the ugly turtle drawings we made at school? Well, it seems like a life time ago isn't it? The memory of those times just hit you full head on and you realize how much you've changed and how everything haven't left unchanged. But that's it, everything is different now and we should admit, we all miss being CARE-FREE. Care-free, even the word speaks for itself.

When I first learned how to live my life-that is to start reading real books, real novels-it was pure bliss. It gave me so many things I couldn't even start to enumerate but I'll try. Let's see. Friends (virual and real). Feelings. Fun. Those are just some. You know once you open the right book fo you and you read, it changes your life. You become aware of everything. But that's not the point here. The point is here is that I am a bookworm, booknerd, whatever you want to call it and I feel the responsibility to the world, to the entire universe to read. And that I want to share whatever these books give me to the world. The question is how? And the answer is simple: Through book blogging.

But for me it's not that simple. Because how can you (become a book blogger) when you are taking up a very crucial college course? You can't just do it. True that, if there's a will, there's a way. But in my case, you choose one you reject the other. You can't study ACCOUNTANCY as you book blog, and you can't blog (as frequent as you should be) if you're an accountancy student. Just, No. You can't serve two masters they say, and it's true.

You might wonder why not? You can if you wish, you are probably thinking. Yeah, sure. I can but the consequence of that is a thing I don't think I can ever bear, and certainly I don't ever want to. I really want to try to be a book blogger but if I do I know I might not give my full time to the blog and just probaby be blogging in my not so very book blogger ways. I've heard that starting to be a bookblogger is hard-really hard. You have to work hard to get those ARCs from publishers but first you have to maintain a good enough reputation as blogger before you can even get some. Even this makes me hesitate to do it.

The hurdles that I needed to jump through before I can be a book blogger:

Time Management.

I so suck at this. I can't even schedule anything. I have a hard time scheduling my study time. Not to mention how to spend my summer time. How can I blog if I don't have a proper shedule? Obviously I can't. I might blog as frequent as once a day and then after a week it just becomes once a month and then it just becomes once a year. Geez. Someone help me on this.

Laziness.

I am a human slug. I am so lazy, I don't even want to get up of the bed, much less bring myself to reply when someone is talking to me. I don't do anything at home but study and read. Yeah, my life is that boring. So tell me? How do I blog?

Ideas.

You know, I don't want to think sometimes. I think like thinking is a reflex and I don't want to make myself think for a long time. I'm pretty sure when you book blog you have to think thoroughly, have enough ideas to put in the blog as memes and all that. I think I'm still not ready for those, I mean I have enough in my mind to think about already.

My college course.

How can I blog if I have my full attention on something else? How can I blog if I am-I need to give my full time to my text books? Tell Me. How can I book blog, if I don't want to fail? I DARE YOU, BE AN ACCOUNTANCY STUDENT AND BE A READER! Let's see if you can survive the course and still read a couple of hundred of books in a year. I have experienced that myself and it's hard. I kid you not. I didn't think I've ever seen an accountancy student book blog or if there even if there was-I don't think it was sucessful. You try to take up accountancy and let's see if you can survive it without not being kicked out of the program. I mean with all those every-sem screening and those mind-blowing, mind-numbing, mind-wrecking, heart breaking exams,especially now that I'll be on 3^rd year next school year (the most crucial year in an accountancy student's life)-HOW CAN YOU JUST BE A BOOK BLOGGER? Being a reader and an accounting student had been hard for me, how much more to be a book blogger at the same time?

So I have my last advice to all of you guys, If you're an avid book reader-simple, don't take up accountancy but if you want to be like me then who am I to tell you?

I might not be a book blogger today, but hopefully in the future I will be. (And I'm so looking forward when that day comes to pass.) I might be a CPA when I'll be starting to book blog, that's right. ;)